


Sunglasses, who knew?

by FeralCreed



Category: The Losers (2010), The Losers (Comic)
Genre: and i don't regret any of it, and so does jake, happy new year's eve losers fandom, that i love dearly, that i wrote in about ninety minutes, that stupid 20/20 vision joke that's been going around, this is 1100 words of pure stupid fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:40:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,134
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22061224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeralCreed/pseuds/FeralCreed
Summary: A simple question turns into something questionable thanks to Jensen's love for terrible jokes and Cougar's willingness to enable him."I now want a fic where someone asks Jensen what he's doing for NYE and he's just kinda "idk haven't made plans" and then like ten minutes later he yells "DAMMIT should've said I didn't know because I don't have 20/20 vision" and Roque's hand is twitching dangerously close to his knife". Thanks Losers Discord.
Comments: 13
Kudos: 19





	Sunglasses, who knew?

“What about you, Jensen?” Pooch asks. 

Jensen's attention shifts from his laptop display to where the other Losers are sitting and playing poker. He'd been tempted to join them, but Cougar had been in a mischievous mood earlier. That meant someone was going to get cheated out of all their money, and then some, and he was not immune to his best friend's occasional whim. He'd like to keep his money, thanks. At least until some new piece of tech comes out that he can't resist. 

“What about me?” 

“What are you doing for New Year's Eve?” 

“Oh.” Jensen stops to think for a moment. “I don't know. I haven't made any plans. Beth is having a sleepover at a friend's house, so Jess is going out with her coworkers. And you guys probably all have your own plans. So I guess I'll just celebrate on my own.” 

The Losers collectively get a fairly worried expression at the news. Jensen thinks that's a little unfair. He hasn't caused any permanent fireworks-related damage on New Year's since... 2016. That's not as impressive as he'd thought it would be now that he thinks about it. But hey, three years is three years! And he has every reason to try to make it four. 2016 had involved a significant amount of paperwork that none of his teammates would touch. Not even Cougar. Jensen had been abandoned to face his fate. 

He takes a breath, ready to declare that he won't get into any trouble this year, but Cougar pointedly clears his throat and Jensen decides to stay silent. After sticking his tongue out at Cougar – and earning a puzzled look from the others who had missed the little exchange between the two of them – he goes back to his laptop. 

“Damn it,” he yells almost ten minutes later. He scowls at the other Losers, who all look fairly startled at his sudden outburst. “I can't believe it. I just can't believe it.” 

Cougar tips his hat back in a _what the hell, Jensen?_ kind of way. His sharp gaze takes in the lack of any weapons, fire, smoke, or blood, and his shoulders slump slightly, expressing what would be a full sigh from anyone else. A now carefully blank expression hints that he's not looking forward to whatever explanation Jensen comes up with this time. 

“When Pooch asked what I was doing. I can't believe I didn't think of it. It was stupid, really, because you guys know, I always have great comebacks, right?” Jensen offers them a grin and is met with what is now one blank face and two puzzled ones. Okay, yeah, he knows what that means. Get to the point. “I should have said I didn't know what I was doing for New Year's Eve because I don't have 20/20 vision.” 

It takes a moment, and then Roque's hand twitches dangerously close to the eighteen-inch-long knife that he'd once decapitated two men with. Pooch has his eyes closed with a resigned look on his face that Jensen has come to translate as _Lord, give me strength_. Clay gives a heavy sigh and reaches for the bottle of cheap whiskey sitting next to him. Cougar simply tilts his hat back down. 

“Oh come on. That was funny!” Jensen protests. “Even you guys have to admit, that was pretty good, and it's, like, literally the last week I'll be able to use that as a pun.” He pauses as a thought occurs to him. 

“No,” Cougar says adamantly, having already caught on to where his train of thought was going. 

“I need to use it as often as I can in the meantime. Hey, Captain! Ask me what I'm doing for New Year's.” 

“Jensen,” Clay says, his voice flat and unamused. “Why are you the way you are?” 

“Don't know, sir,” Jensen replies cheerfully. “I don't have-” 

“If you finish that sentence, so help me god,” Clay threatens, and Cougar can't quite hide his smirk, hat or no. 

“The Pooch is folding. There's not enough left in that bottle to deal with Jensen's shitty jokes.” 

“Oh, come on!” Jensen says again. 

Cougar reaches up to fist bump Pooch as he passes, his amusement still evident. Smart man for taking off. Cougar has been around Jensen more than any of the others, and at this point, is immune to all but the worst of Jensen's humor. He's not bothered by this considering the truly awful puns that Jensen loves to make when he's drunk. Instead he scoops Pooch's cards toward him and sets both hands on top of the deck before starting to shuffle. Roque and Clay hand theirs over as well, though Roque insists on dealing the next round. 

Pooch comes back out with sunglasses in one hand and his coat in the other. Jensen takes one look at him and starts giggling. 

“Dude,” Pooch says tiredly. “Just, what the hell?” 

“Sunglasses,” Cougar replies. This only gets him a confused look. He looks over at Jensen and sighs when he realizes that Jensen is laughing too hard to be able to explain. “Your sunglasses made him think of regular glasses used to give people 20/20 vision.” 

“Cougar, I swear to god, man, I'm gonna whoop both your asses if I hear that one more time.” 

Jensen is delighted to see a slow, shit-eating grin form on Cougar's face. Yeah, their sniper is the quiet one of the lot of them, but he's still a brat when the mood strikes him. And he's always been delightfully willing to go along with Jensen's dumb ideas. 

“Hey Cougar. What were the results of your eye exam when you enlisted?” 

Pooch throws his sunglasses right at Jensen's face. He grabs them and shoves them up into his hair, where they stay until he forgets about them and knocks them off while swatting at a fly buzzing near him. He starts snickering again until Cougar reaches over and takes them away from him. Even though Pooch is long gone, Jensen is evidently not to be trusted with anything reminding him of his horrible joke, so Cougar folds them up and hands them over to Clay, who puts them inside his jacket. That will hopefully relieve Jensen of the temptation to continue joking about them. 

Jensen, predictably, forgets about the sunglasses as soon as they're out of his line of sight. Roque and Clay get invested in some argument about Barcelona a moment later, so Cougar snags the bottle they're no longer paying attention to and goes to sit next to Jensen. He's still sitting there, much emptier bottle resting on his thigh, when Pooch gets back. 

“You forgot your sunglasses,” Cougar says with a slow smile. 

“For fuck's sake,” Pooch hisses, and Cougar can't help a quiet laugh.


End file.
